Friday, June 15, 2007

June Ramblings

I made up a new word: "debezzling." It's kind of like embezzling, but the exact opposite. Instead of slowly stealing money from your company, you slowly and secretively invest money without expecting to see a return. I'm not saying it's a smart practice or something you should do, I'm just saying it's a new word. (Also, embezzle just seems like a weird word to me. It's a very serious, negative action, but it's so fun to spell, with those double Z's. Fun to say to... embezzzzzzzzzle.)

If I ever make a movie, I think I am going to ad a secondary title to the movie. Like instead of calling it "Death Blow" I'd call it this: "Death Blow: The Sequel to the Prequel." The title makes you think. It's kind of a "back to the future" kind of thing.

What is up with mint gum? Have you noticed how many different flavors of mint gum there are these days? Spearmint, wintergreen, peppermint, bubblemint, mint chocolate chip... the list goes on. WTF, where did all these mints come from? As far as I know, there is only one mint plant. Is the gum market so specific that R&D is having them diversify their mint portfolio to capture a larger customer base?

Is anyone else pissed off by the "proud parent" identifier on MySpace? Let me explain. On your myspace profile, you have a couple options to identify whether you have children or want them... none, someday, never, and proud parent. They don't let you choose "yes, I have kids." Just "proud parent." Why do they assume you're proud? What if you're ashamed? Or regretful? Or embarrassed? I would love to see somebody with some serious baby mama drama choose "ashamed parent." Someday... someday.

There have been a lot of threequels in the movie theaters lately. Spiderman 3. Pirates 3. Ocean's (1)3. They aren't that good. I mean, they're entertaining, like it held my attention while I'm in the theater. And they all look good, with their CGI special effects and everything. But I'm just disappointed with all of them. I wouldn't pay to see them again.

And lastly, I just wanted to officially declare that the Spiderman series has lost steam. How can I tell? Because Lloyd, the mechanic from "Wings," and Eric from "That 70's Show" are the villains. Yes, the villains, not the sidekicks or supporting cast. The villains. Doesn't any good actor want to play a villain? These are the only two guys we can get? Really? The goofy guy from Sideways and the skinny guy who calls himself Topher? Who will the villains for Spiderman 4 be, Tony Shalub and Will Valderama? (Oh, snap!)